Last Updated: February 12, 2021, 10:39 pm

DSU community addresses importance of self-love

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People can find self love in various ways including embracing your physical appearance and painting or taking self portraits of yourself. While taking out time for yourself can seem selfish, Jared Dupree, department chair of communication studies, said it’s the opposite. Photo by Misha Mosiichuk.


Valentine’s Day is the holiday every single person dreads; however, this year self-love should be your No. 1 priority. Whether you are single or taken, you should always find ways to celebrate the things you love about yourself.

“We require self-love just like we require water and air,” said James Stein, assistant professor of communication studies.

Media cleanse

As we are constantly scrolling, liking and exploring social media, it is important that we realize we are in control of what we see and how much we see that content.

“We can control the media that we consume, the accounts we follow, and we shouldn’t be giving these strangers power and control over us,” said Kisa Smith, part-time humanities and social sciences instructor.

As individuals, we have control and dominance over who we are following on our social media accounts. It is natural that as humans, we compare our own lives to others.

Checkout these positive and uplifting Instagram accounts:

  • @happyfitkatie
  • @therapywithabby
  • @thegoodquote
  • @positivemindsetdaily
  • @istudyhappiness

Affirmations & manifestations

Jared Dupree, department chair of communication studies, said, “Self-affirmations are ways of thinking a thought about ourselves in a positive way toward [ourselves].”

This can be done in a daily journal, our minds or even out loud. When you feed your mind with positive thoughts, it will override negativity.

“You cannot rely on someone else to bring you happiness or to give you positive affirmations,” Smith said.

Start everyday with these self-affirmations:

  • “I am beautiful.”
  • “Today I am choosing happiness.”
  • “I am perfect just the way I am.”
  • “I deserve to be loved and respected.”
  • “I am capable of anything.”

Rely on yourself for happiness

Relying on yourself to provide your own happiness is not something we naturally think to do for ourselves. Make time in the day for you.

This can consist of anything, including listening to your favorite artist in the car as loud as the speakers will hold up, treating yourself to lunch from Chick-Fil-A, or even cuddling-up on the couch to read your all-time favorite novel. The idea is that you are making time in your day for something that you know will make your heart and soul happy.

“A lot of people feel that taking out time for themselves is selfish,” Dupree said. “It is actually the opposite; it is the most unselfish thing you can do.”

When you start to make time for yourself in the way that you would for others, you will have more self-compassion and will be happier overall.

Focus on what YOU have control of

“Self-love is something we have complete control over; it is one of the few things we have 100% control over,” Dupree said.

We need to take advantage of that opportunity and increase the love we have for ourselves. As humans, we tend to worry most about the things we have zero control over, such as the past, expectations from others and even judgment from our peers.

Take time to determine and write out the things in your life that you have control over. We have the ability to control our gratitude for life, our fitness journey, the food we put into our bodies, and how much sleep we get each night.

Focusing on the things in life that we have complete control over allows for less stress, more self-love, and acceptance of ourselves and others.

Personal reflection

“We must be honest with ourselves regarding our goals, expectations, desires and needs,” Stein said.

Self-love is all about being in-tune with ourselves through remembering our goals and desires. Take time to self-reflect through meditation, write in a journal, or take a walk around your neighborhood. Focus on the things that you are proud of yourself for accomplishing or ways that you want to better yourself.

“[It’s all about] having self-worth, and not just accepting yourself, but understanding the value that you have and how that value can be offered to others in the world,” Dupree said.

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