“Do you want to move in together?”
These words are said by couples all over the world once their relationship reaches what they deem to be serious. Most couples consider this the next step to enhance their relationship and become closer. Some feel living together will help them because if they choose to get married, there will be no surprises once they tie the knot.
Moving in together shows a lack of confidence in your loved one. If you love someone enough, it should not matter whether the person leaves the toilet seat up, leaves dirty dishes on the counter, or forgets to turn off the lights before leaving the house.
According to an article published in 2011 on PBS.com by Dr. Thomas Bradbury, couples who live together before marriage are more likely to fight with one another and use aggression toward each other. They are also likely to judge one another and try to change the habits of the person.
The next problem is couples moving in with each other just for the physical perks of living with someone. You look at movies like “Friends With Benefits” and it encourages this behavior. Their relationship is based purely on their physical emotions and needs, and that is not what a relationship should be based on. I am not saying that a physical relationship is bad; that is bound to happen at some point. But when a relationship is based purely on having a sexual relationship, that is a problem. If you are just attracted to someone because of this, that is not love — that is lust.
People who are in love with one another should want to get married to show the world their love and celebrate the relationship they have created. After they are married, the next obvious step would be to buy a house together, where they have a shared place to live and grow closer as a couple. The uncertainty levels are down because you have already committed to that person and will try harder to get through disagreements.
Living together before marriage has negative effects on relationships, and any two people who truly love each other should wait to share a space together until the question, “Will you marry me?” is asked.